Hump Day Humor: 5 Funniest Tweets of the Week So Far

Anlee vs. Drake: 0 to 100 (Real Quick)

I never thought I'd say this, but some things were so much easier when Anlee was younger. Yes, she is just one. But technically, she is a toddler...and boy does she act like it.

When she was an "infant", there was always a reason behind her crying. The list was short: she was hungry, she was tired, she was cold, she lost her pacifier, she was teething. That's it. You knew if she was crying, it was because of one of those things. The task was to find which one.

But something wizardish happened when she turned one. She went from "infant" to "toddler" classification and somehow she was aware of it and had to behave like her new class. It was if someone waved a magic wand and cast a spell of tantrums.

Now I don't want to make it seem like she's in a horrible mood all the time. A majority of the day, she looks like this:

A happy baby, smiling about life and learning everything she can about what's around her. Her laughs are the best thing in my world. But as Drake said, she can go 0 to 100 real quick, real real quick. Perfectly fine and giggling one moment, baby rager the next.

Things That Can Start an Anlee Rager

• Gets anything taken away from her
• Runs out of milk
• Can't reach a desirable object
• Supervising adult shuts the gate leading to the stairs
• She falls...even if it's on her cushioned bum
• She nearly falls...but catches herself, surprising herself that she caught herself
• Steps on a toy and/or object she didn't see
• Carry her when she wants down
• Put her down when she wants down
• A toy doesn't act like she thinks it should
• A toy looks at her wrong
• The couch looks at her wrong

Hump Day Humor: 5 Funniest Tweets of the Week So Far

Fart Jokes: Is a Sense of Humor Hereditary or is it Taught?

This morning at 3 a.m. as I was rocking her, trying to put her back to sleep, my one-year-old daughter farted on me...and then laughed.

While Anlee has been cutting the cheese on my lap in the early morning hours for awhile now, this is the first time that she actually thought it was funny. Yes, before she can even talk, my baby daughter has fart jokes.

Perhaps it was just an accident, but it was hilarious to me. And it got me thinking more about her little sense of humor and how it compares to mine.

Is it funny?	Anlee	Daddy
Farting	Yes	Yes
Animal noises	Yes	Yes
Peekaboo	Yes	No
Window curtains	Yes	No
Splashing in the bath	Yes	Yes
Bubbles	Yes	Yes
Mickey Mouse	Yes	Sometimes
Peter Griffin	No	Yes
Dane Cook	No	No
Mommy Dancing	Yes	Yes

Could it be that my baby daughter is already picking up on what I think is funny? Or was she just born with a Jones-sense of humor?

It goes back to the age-old argument of Nature vs. Nurture.

I tend to think, in this case, humor is mostly nurture: as you absorb what's happening in your environment, you learn from others around you. What they smile about, you will smile about. What they giggle about, you will giggle about. What they cry about, you will cry about.

So perhaps Anlee caught me laughing at her flatulence a couple times and picked up on it. Or maybe she saw me chuckling to a Family Guy fart song. But there is always the possibility breaking wind is universally humorous...a stinky etch in our DNA.

Hump Day Humor: 5 Funniest Tweets of the Week So Far

Monday Meme

Anlee's Analytical Concepts of Yelling at Stuff 101

Since turning one, Anlee has become a real chatty Cathy. She dabbled in babble before, but she's now well voiced in, well, voice. 

And most of the time she isn't talking to anyone...at least any living, breathing thing. She'll carry on a conversation with herself, a toy, a piece of furniture, the window or a wayward Dorito crumb. It doesn't really matter to her, similar to Donald Trump, just as long as she can hear herself talk. 

She's speaking words that only she can understand, because so far I only recognize two phrases:

"na-na" = food (ALL food, drink and stuff she will put in her mouth)

"bub-bub" = puppy

Sure, she says "da-da-da" and "ma-ma-ma", but she isn't directing them at either one of her parents. Soon it will make sense to her though, very soon. But until then, she's just putting random consonants and vowels together to make these alien sentences. Anlee doesn't just use her inside voice though. Sometimes she whispers, sometimes she sounds like she's asking a question, however most of the time it's a straight up scream of vocal diarrhea.   

It's hilarious...for now. 

I'm guessing once she actually starts speaking intelligible English and sassing back to mom and dad, we won't think it's quite as funny. Until that happens though, she can keep hauling high decibel insults at the sofa all she wants.

Hump Day Humor: 5 Funniest Tweets of the Week So Far

BONUS TWEET:

Monday Meme

The First Year of Anlee

"Happiness" - The Fray

Happiness is just outside my window 
Would it crash blowing 80-miles an hour? 
Or is happiness a little more like knocking 
On your door, and you just let it in? 

Happiness feels a lot like sorrow 
Let it be, you can’t make it come or go 
But you are gone- not for good but for now 
Gone for now feels a lot like gone for good 

Happiness is a firecracker sitting on my headboard 
Happiness was never mine to hold 
Careful child, light the fuse and get away 
‘Cause happiness throws a shower of sparks 

Happiness damn near destroys you 
Breaks your faith to pieces on the floor 
So you tell yourself, that’s enough for now 
Happiness has a violent roar 

Happiness is like the old man told me 
Look for it, but you’ll never find it all 
Let it go, live your life and leave it 
Then one day, wake up and she’ll be home 
Home, home, home

Anlee's New Year's Resolutions

• Eat more cookies and other non-slushy foods...gain 10+ pounds
  
• Stop yelling at the furniture
  
• Spend more time napping than pooping
  
• Knock over any Lego tower looking at me
  
• Talk to more imaginary friends on my phone/shoe
  
• Find out where mommy disappears when she peek-a-boos
  
• Get my nose back from daddy (it looks strangely similar to his thumb)