Nobody Likes the Weatherman this Winter...Not Even Babies

Back to the Future: Six Years, A Marriage, A House & A Baby Later

The Young Couple in 2008

It's been six years since my last first date. Valentine's Day 2008.

It's difficult to comprehend not knowing each other, but my wife and I were nearly complete strangers as we sat across the table from one another at a Quincy restaurant. She was nervously twirling her hair and hated awkward silences. I was nervously chugging down cheese soup and asking a lot more than 20 questions. Funny how time works.

Fast forward to 2014 and there is no nervousness anymore. Hell, our master bathroom doesn't even have a door...so we can see, hear, smell and sometimes even taste everything going on in there anytime of day or night. She's the one who now does most of the talking and questioning because I've run out of things to ask. But I still love me some cheese soup!

I think it's important to remember where our relationships have come from and what they've become. Appreciate the growth. Acknowledge the blessings. Accept the experiences...good and bad.

If you subscribe to the notion of the Butterfly Effect: if just one little sentence was out of place, if one argument had turned out differently, if we had missed one kiss, my wife and I might not be where we are today. The wedding, our daughter, our life...non-existent.

The struggle comes in recognizing that every moment is an important moment. We might blow off our every day exchanges, conversations and actions, thinking we've had millions of them and millions more are to come. But I made a vow to my wife on our wedding day:

"My hope is that our love is never satisfied, always seeking more,

Every day to wake up with purpose, to not settle…but explore."

So I have to remind myself not to take a morning for granted, maybe say something nice after I get home from work. My relationships deserve the effort. My destiny deserves the time.

I'm so thankful that past turned into this present. And now my challenge every day is to make sure our future is even better.  

The Young Family: Valentine's Day 2014

My Daughter, the Internet Celebrity

As an Electronic Marketing Manager, one of my main job requirements is to get my brand noticed through social media. Attract as many eyeballs as I can. And those eyeballs should share with other eyeballs and on down the ocular line. But how does someone create a post that will go viral?

Well from many years working in news and many more years of being a human, I've found there are three things that can garner the public's attention in a flash:

1. Babies

2. Pets

3. A Water Skiing Squirrel

Since I don't currently possess the latter two, but I do have a baby...I decided to make Anlee a living advertisement (but she's not doing it for free, she gets complimentary diaper changes and I compensate her with rich milk). Some might accuse me of child exploitation, but it's not like she's promoting Russian vodka or the next Kevin Hart movie or anything. My company is all about family values, so what a great way to promote that...with my family getting valued by the adoring interwebs.

I simply take a picture of my daughter doing something, post it to our Facebook page and watch the "aawwww-someness" spread. She's so cute, it doesn't take much to get clicks. Our followers love the posts and some even upload pictures of their own kids. Sharing is caring.

It's rare to have a mascot that grows. But I have a living, breathing, eating, pooping brand spokesman who doesn't mind posing for her paparazzi dad.

Maybe one day my daughter will tell me no more. Maybe one day she'll tell me she prefers Walmart! But for now, she's my little internet celebrity.

Why So Serious? The Best Parenting Jokes

A Sunday school teacher is concerned that his students might be a little confused about Jesus, so he asks his class, "Where is Jesus today?"

Steven raises his hand and says, "He's in Heaven."
Mary answers, "He's in my heart."
Little Johnny waves his hand furiously and blurts out, "He's in our bathroom!"

The surprised teacher asks Little Johnny how he knows this.

"Well," Little Johnny says, "every morning, my father gets up, bangs on the bathroom door and yells 'Jesus Christ, are you still in there?!'"
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A woman got on a bus holding a baby.

The bus driver said: "That's the ugliest baby I've ever seen."

In a huff, the woman slammed her fare into the fare box and took an aisle seat near the rear of the bus.

The man seated next to her sensed that she was agitated and asked her what was wrong.

"The bus driver insulted me," she fumed.

The man sympathized and said: "Why, he's a public servant and shouldn't say things to insult passengers."

"You're right," she said. "I think I'll go back up there and give him a piece of my mind."

"That's a good idea," the man said. "Here, let me hold your monkey."
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A man observed a woman in the grocery store with a three year old girl in her basket. As they passed the cookie section, the child asked for cookies and her mother told her "no." The little girl immediately began to whine and fuss, and the mother said quietly, "Now Ellen, we just have half of the aisles left to go through; don't be upset. It won't be long."

He passed the Mother again in the candy aisle. Of course, the little girl began to shout for candy. When she was told she couldn't have any, she began to cry. The mother said, "There, there, Ellen, don't cry. Only two more aisles to go, and then we'll be checking out."

The man again happened to be behind the pair at the check-out, where the little girl immediately began to clamor for gum and burst into a terrible tantrum upon discovering there would be no gum purchased today. The mother patiently said, "Ellen, we'll be through this check out stand in five minutes, and then you can go home and have a nice nap."

The man followed them out to the parking lot and stopped the woman to compliment her. "I couldn't help noticing how patient you were with little Ellen..."

The mother broke in, "My little girl's name is Tammy... I'm Ellen." 

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A man calls the doctor and speaks frantically into the phone, "My wife is pregnant, and her contractions are only two minutes apart!"

"Is this her first child?" the doctor queries.

"No, you idiot!" the man shouts. "This is her husband!"

Anlee's First Dance - Don't Wake Me Up

One for All, All for One

You would think after a month, new parents would start to establish some sort of routine or at least a comfort zone with each other, the baby and the family as a whole. But mistaken lawyer, that's not the case. Life will always throw you some chaos just to make sure you're not dead yet.

You expect the baby to have a major impact on your day to day life as parents...maybe what you didn't expect was the baby's effect on your relationship as a couple. The sleepless nights, constant crying and baby showcasing to any stranger in your acreage can wear you thin already but be weary of contempt toward each other creeping in.

I went back to work a eight days after Anlee was born. My wife stayed home with the baby for the next few weeks. That in itself can create a huge divide.

Man thinks:
"She has it easy...spending all that time at home laying around, taking naps with the baby."
"I come home from working all day and what has she done?"
"I haven't had sex in months, can't I get a feel of those big boobs?"

Woman thinks:
"He has it easy...going to work and talking to other adults all day."
"I've been feeding, changing, quieting the baby all day and what has he done?"
"He'd better not even think about touching me."  

Even though you're going through the new parent experience together...you can feel so alone sometimes. 

So I can't stress this enough...COMMUNICATE EVERYTHING!

Ask how each other's day went, talk about what's going on tomorrow, dream out loud about the future, laugh about the baby's farts. Silence can kill a relationship. Don't let things fester or rejection build.

I have to caution myself now every time I rush to a judgement. I need to have empathy...put myself in her shoes. I need to listen not just to hear her, but understand. Don't immediately dismiss what she says because I may think I know better, but see what she has to offer.

Strive to find a connection instead of severing it. The baby is vocal about her discomfort, but your wife may not be. So occasionally ask her if she's doing ok...really doing ok and not just saying it. Try to give her a break from the baby if she needs it. Burping, changing, rocking, swinging, swaddling can all be great bonding experiences for you and the baby and offer a competitive challenge for you to see how fast and how well you can do things.

When trying to raise a new human, don't forget about the human you're married to.